Sam's School Memorial

A while back, I wrote about the memorial ceremony at Sam's school. I took lots of photos, but as of today they are still trapped on my camera (I know, I know, I could have been more pro-active about getting them off, but I haven't).

However, lovely Gilly at Sam's school (his favourite teacher who has been so great to us over the last 10 months), who I saw last week when she came in for a workshop, sent me a disc with some photos on it. So I thought I'd at least show you the lovely plaque they have placed in the main school corridor:
And these are the three lemon trees:
Apparently they were well watered in the holidays, lots of keen volunteers! So they will go well I think...

Feeling the Love

OK, so I'm loved.

It's still a little hard to comprehend, but it appears to be true.

My last day at school was quite lovely. Hectic, but lovely nonetheless. I had many kids give me cards, flowers, chocolates, wine and other pressies...and then of course there were the staff.
I got a lovely send off from the staff, with my (ex) boss offering some very kind and ego-boosting words (that I bring fun into the workplace, that I'm a 'glass half-full' person, that I take on lots of different challenges and manage to do them well).

All in all, it was a nice way to leave the place that I have worked for the last 3 and 3/4 years.

Mind you, I saw many of them again tonight, at a staff dinner that had been planned for a while.
We went out for some drinks and then a lovely Thai dinner, followed by more drinks and dancing at a pub. A great night of good conversation, great food, dancing, and a few more people telling me how 'awesome' I am.

I tell you, if this keeps up, I'm going to have a hugely swelled head! But as I said in the last post, it is nice to know people think so highly of me. It's hard to take, but it's definitely nice to know.

While I'm on the subject of awesome people, there were other events that made yesterday a very emotional day.

In the evening, Samuel's school had a tree planting and memorial dedication. His close friends had been planning it for a while, and they did such a great job.

We got there about 5:30, and the boys and Anthony and Oliver (I was taking photos which are currently trapped on my camera!) planted three lemon trees in pots that were donated by Bunnings. The boys then read out some lovely words they had written, with some great memories of their time with Sam.

After that, we went inside to the corridor adjacent to the courtyard garden where the trees are being kept. They have mounted a plaque there dedicated to Sam, with his photo and the words:

Sam McLauchlan
Memorial Garden
1996-2009
You lived well, laughed often
and loved much.
Forever in our hearts
The class of 2011

It's very lovely (I'll post a picture if I can ever rescue the photos off my camera - or if I take another one).

After that, we stayed for a concert the students were putting on. The first item was a song written and performed by Samuel's close friends Harry, Nick and Dave. These are the lyrics (with permission from Harry - thanks):

Harry:
You and I. We are worlds apart.
Things are different now, and I don't know, where you are.
I got caught up. I was livin' my own life.
Then I heard. That you left me, and when I turn around,
And your gone.
Farewell my friend. I wish you well my friend.
With all your travelling. And just how, you'll get through.

All:
We had some good times. Well that was another time.
The world keeps on spinnin' 'round. Oh and I'll remember you.

David:
Once I heard, that you were gone.
I didn't believe, but i was wrong.
Life right now, won't be the same.
Untill we meet, We'll all be in pain.
Farewell my friend. To the end my friend.
To the end. I will see you again.

Chorus

Harry and David speaking:
We laughed, we cried, we said goodbye.
But someone gave you, a license to fly.
I did not think, you'd be gone so long.
But it's 7 months and I'm still wrong.
Farewell my freind, we will meet again.
Farewell my friend, we will meet again.

Chorus

Riff

Chorus

Fade out riff.

"I changed it a bit to make it sound better. And in the last verse I'm gonna change the months every month."

Sam's School

We're lucky enough to live within walking distance of a great public school.
Samuel and Oliver both started preschool there, and Samuel completed year 8 there in 2009.

Samuel didn't always like school, especially in year 5 and 6, I think partly because he was a little overweight at that point, and felt uncomfortable.
But when he got to high school, after the initial settling-in/finding his feet, he actually started to blossom. By year 8 he was getting good reports and good grades, and the teachers always spoke highly of him. Many of them came to his funeral as well.

The principal of the school came to see us not long after Samuel's funeral (she had been overseas at the time), and was able to lead the school staff through their talks to the other students as well as notifying the school community. She also brought us a couple of old yearbooks that had photos of Sam in them. Another teacher went out of his way to find photos of Sam (taken at camps etc) and put them on discs for us. We were blown away by the kindness and support we received from the school. Even the P&C helped us with organising back-to-school stuff for Oliver.

I have been in semi-regular contact with the year 9 coordinator, who was also Samuel's science teacher (and his favourite). She has been talking to the students at the school about what they would like to do to honour Sam's memory. Because he died in the holidays (4 days after term 4 ended), some of the students didn't know, and others hadn't had a chance to talk it through with each other, so she has been guiding them through those conversations.

The students were sure that they wanted to have some kind of memorial for Sam, and recently she sent me an email telling me about the meeting she had had with them.
The kids had some interesting ideas: They wanted to hold a carnival in Samuel's honour, to make wrist bands etc...she said they went a little crazy and she had to bring them down again, but eventually they came up with some ideas.

The Yearbook
The school is going to dedicate a page to Samuel in this year's yearbook, with the kids contributing some photos and quotes. As I've said before, he was pretty popular, so it's kind of fitting that the kids thought to do this for him.

The Video
The kids really wanted to make a 'documentary' about Sam: interviewing people and including some funny memories and reflections about Sam. I thought this was a very nice idea!

The Award
Right at the beginning, we asked the principal if we could contribute to an award in Sam's name.
We offered to cover any costs and provide a 'prize' for the student who ran it. When they talked to the kids about it, they loved the idea, and want the award to be along the lines of 'happiest student of the year', as that was the way they saw Sam. We thought it was a very nice idea. The year 10 students will nominate one of their peers, and the award will be judged by a panel including some of Samuel's friends (and perhaps one of us).

The Door
They also wanted to paint one of the music room doors orange, because orange is Sam's favourite colour, and because he spent a lot of time in the music room.

The Lemon Tree
This one is my favourite. Samuel used to think he was very cool when he could eat a whole lemon. I didn't think much of it at the time (just a kid showing off), but it must have been something he made a big deal about at school, because the kids were very keen to give the award recipient a lemon tree. To me, this shows how much impact Samuel had on people's lives, because it's a memory that has stuck with many of them.
We thought that it might not be the best idea to give someone a tree, as they might not be able to look after it. We told the teacher that, and after she spoke to the kids they agreed, but did not want to let the lemon tree idea go. So instead, they are going to plant one out the front of the school and create a bit of a memorial garden for Sam. What a lovely idea.
We have ordered some lemon trees from Diggers, and hopefully will get the chance to help them plant them.

As for the award prize, we will donate a JB Hifi voucher (because of Sam's love of music and video games), and a Goodberry's voucher (because he loved Goodberry's). I think that will go down well.

Writing it down here, it seems like a lot. But from what I can tell, the kids are pretty determined! I told the teacher I was concerned that we were stringing the whole thing out too much, that they might be better off not having it in their face all the time, but she said that 'they're not going to let him go that easy'.

So it's all very nice. Once again, reaffirming my belief that all teens aren't so bad. And that I chose the right school. Thanks to all of you.

The Mural

During Samuel's funeral, we invited his friends (and anyone else) to come and write messages for him on the coffin (I know, I haven't written about that, I'm getting there...). It was a really nice moment and it got me thinking.

We didn't want to leave Samuel's ashes at the crematorium; it's a fair way away from our house and we wanted him close. We thought about the cemetary closest to us, but we didn't really have any connection with that. So we brought him home with us. The ashes currently live in his bedroom, wrapped in a The Living End t-shirt, and that's working OK for us right now. Who knows what we'll do in the future, but I figure we've got time to work it out.

But that did leave the problem of where would people go to pay their respects? That's one good thing about a grave or memorial site, you can go and visit talk (or just sit).

So we decided to create a mural. It's on the side fence, so people can do it without having to come and see us, and so far there's been no vandalism or anything.

The paint was donated by a friend of Anthony and I did all the spray work. The small panel on the right is what Ollie did that day. It says "Samuel I had so much fun from Oli". We put our own messages on (this is mine - I know, I spelled gorgeous wrong, DOH!):

We have had a lot of people (especially kids) coming and writing messages on the mural, which is really nice. On Sam's birthday, all his friends went out there and wrote birthday messages.
It might be a little unconventional, but it's working well for us. When we get our act together, we're going to put a little garden bed out there, and plant a couple of blueberry plants (Samuel loved blueberries).

We're very happy that people are using it.