The grass is always greener on the other side, right?
I know this, but it doesn't stop me wanting to leave here, go somewhere. Anywhere. Anywhere but here.
When we were in holidays, it was always in my mind: I could move up here (Queensland), open a theme park maybe (Legoland of course- don't you reckon Australia needs a Legoland?).
Of course, the far north coast of NSW was even better. I fell in love (again) with the green rolling hills, little macadamia farms, views forever...if I had a million bucks, I'd move there now, somewhere between Mullumbimby and Bellingen.
Of course, I do this every time I travel. You've probably noticed. I'm pretty sure I mentioned it in my last post.
But what's worse is that I do it when I'm here too.
A couple of days ago, I came across an awesome job opportunity with Apple. A job that I'm actually qualified for and would love to do. Reading the job description, it actually seemed like on that I'd have a good chance of getting.
The problem? It's based in Melbourne.
Now I'd love to live and work in Melbourne, so it was very tempting to dash off an application. But of course once I talked to Oliver, I realized I couldn't do it. He was horrified at the prospect of moving, going a new school. Leaving our friends and family behind.
So shelved that idea. Because as much as I'd love it, at the moment I need to consider Oliver's best interests. Not because I'm some martyr that lives for her child (although I guess I do), but because he's had enough upheaval in his life. And, I must admit, I'd miss my family and friends too.
So I'll stay put. Moving may might stay a retirement dream.
But where does that leave me? How do I keep myself satisfied and happy?
I don't know why I have this urge for change. Perhaps it's my new, post-Sam attitude. Or maybe it's because I didn't do all those travel, party animal, career-advancing things in my 20s (I only regret that a little bit- I'm very happy to have had my time with Sam). Perhaps it's even my sagittariun 'wanderer' tendencies. Who knows?
But...I'm staying put for now. I've told Anthony that he's got until I'm 45 until I pack it all in and move somewhere. Perhaps that will be some land in the ACT region where I can grow my berries and enjoy the views, or maybe I'll go further. I not know yet. I hope I'll be able to stifle some of these urges until then...