Thursday, September 29, 2011

You are getting sleepy...

A ruffled mind makes a restless pillow.  ~Charlotte Brontë

Do you ever wake up in the middle of the night (or the morning) completely disorientated? I quite often wake up thinking 'where the hell am I?', and sometimes go as far as jumping out of bed to investigate. Like early this morning when I woke up wondering why all the furniture in my room had been rearranged.

Sleep and I are sometimes terribly at odds. There are times that I'll sleep soundly all night, but others where I'll wake up at 2 or 3 in the morning and have no chance of getting back to sleep.

Those times are good for getting reading done. Sometimes I'll read blogs and sometimes a novel. I quite like the iPhone/iPad for those moments, as you can read without turning the light on. Not good when you're totally hooked on a paper book (I'm on book three of the Game of Thrones series and loving it), but otherwise very handy.

I'm also a bit strange in that strange bit between awake and asleep. I'll quite often be sitting innocently on the couch with Anthony and he'll say 'what did you just say?'. Guaranteed it will be something weird about singing elephants or cross-dressing serial killers. Who knows what's going on in my subconscious?

I remember after Sam died sleep was next to impossible. We spent the nights of the first week together on the lounge, not sleeping, but even after that sleep was always broken (most of the time by checking on Oliver), but sometimes with the bad dreams and grief stuff that was inevitable I guess. And a lot of those disoriented moments included forgetting that Sam wasn't there.

Being the busy person I am, I often think how productive I'd be if we didn't have to sleep. But really, there's nothing like that feeling when it all goes right and you're snuggled up warm and comfy and sleep is the only thing you want...

1 comment:

  1. I am with you on the sleep thing. I can sleep really well or really terribly. Usually stress or worry affects it which is understandable. Or if I have a really bad dream, it takes me ages to settle back down. I am also known to wake disorientated, and scared, not knowing where I am.

    I have experienced those moments of drifting off after losing someone, then waking and having a few seconds of not remembering......then it floods back, makes me sick to the stomach.

    One thing I found helped, and I should do it more is yoga nidra, a guided meditation, very relaxing. Also bach remedies makes a sleep rescue remedy that helps. If I wake startled or stressed, I can take it, I think it helps.

    Laura xoxo


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