Monday, April 26, 2010


I feel like crap.
I'm not well, but it's probably not as bad as I've had before. I haven't got much energy, and a fairly constant sinus headache, it seems to be the usual virus/turn of the season sort of thing.

No, it's more than just illness. I just feel flat, (probably) depressed, and listless. I don't really care what I'm eating or how much weight I'm putting on or how much I'm drinking. I know I should be out in the garden or playing outside with Ollie or doing some tidying or getting ready for work tomorrow, but I don't care. Well, no, that's wrong, I do care, but I just don't want to think about it. It would be nice to just switch off, and not think about anything at all for a while. But I know that's not the solution either.

I suppose it's the grief. My way of dealing with it. I know that my food issues are most likely rooted in some kind of psychological issue. Something that I have to deal with to be able to eat properly and lose weight, but surely I'm not going to have much success with that while I'm trying to process this grief stuff.

Just a vent. I know it's not always like this, just how I fell today.
Carry on.

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